The Fringies: Nominations Begin
Yes, Friends, it’s time to recognize the outstanding among us Fullertonians. And by outstanding I mean the brain-dead, the lethargic, the incredibly stupid, the greedy, the shifty, and, every so often, the actual achievers. So let’s start.
In the category of Stupidest Statements Made in Public in 2009 we have four nominees. It’s interesting because three of them center around the person of City Council woman Pam Keller.
1. First is Pam Keller herself with the now legendary “fiscal conservatives as the five of us are” comment. It’s not long but it’s pretty breathtaking. Here’s the link to the post.
2. Second is the loud-mouthed member of Pam’s Posse with no “political whatevers” who made a spectacle out of herself with a long-winded, lame, and ultimately satiro-brilliant string of drivel about why Pam Keller should be mayor. Although not nominated because she didn’t actually say anything, Saint Joan at the Stake in the background deserves special recognition for wonderfully pious gestures and glances skyward. Enjoy again.
3. Third, this wonderful piece of utter nonsense uttered by every one’s favorite hysterical corn pone pontificator, Dick Jones, on why you don’t change horses in mid-stream, and why Don Bankhead should be mayor two years in a row – because (not in spite of the fact!) that the City’s proverbial barrel bobs along in a “raging financial torrent” toward Doc Heehaw’s “symbolic Niagara Falls.” Great fun.
4. Finally, there’s this pearl mumbled out by Council aspirant Marty Burbank last summer: “as a lawyer” he doesn’t know if the Redevelopment expansion is legal, but of course he supports it anyway. Well he certainly demonstrates all the requisite qualifications to be on the Fullerton City Council with this gem.
I vote for Pam Keller’s ardent fan spokeswoman “political whatevers”.
Dr. Jones could have easily came through with all four nominations just by himself. Thanks for giving all the other boneheads a chance.
JERBIE in his junior park ranger outfit and hat
Probolsky in his fat nakedness
Jonny Boy Fleshman and his directors chair and FleshCam
Jerbie in his FART Boy costume-Pfffffft
hey anon, didn’t you read the post? It’s the “Stupidest Statements Made in Public in 2009”. So, post the statement that your nominees made so we can judge whether or not they come close to the 4 stupid ones mentioned in this post.
I’m going with Burbank, man that guys a stooge and a half.
For me its a tie. I cant really tell you that Burbank saying he didnt know if it was legal but he supported it any way is any more stupid than Kellar throwing herself a bone by trying to slip in to the fiscal conservative tent. Both statements are beautifully stupid and equally deserving.