More Fringies: Wackiest Political Stooge O’ The Year
Oh, Ye Cruel Amethyst Plasticine Gods above! In a year full of wacky political campaigns this category just screams out “potential!”
Now, the Nominating Committee wasn’t interested in the typical collection of paid-to-blog courtesans that whore themselves as part of their quotidian life’s work: creeps like Dan Chomolungma and Matthew J. Cunningham. Oh, no no no!
This category embraces the brief shooting stars who, in their trajectories across the local political firmament, burn with an incandescent glow before vanishing into the irrelevance of lifelong mundane hackery. And by burn with an incandescent glow, I mean make utter jackasses out of themselves shamelessly bending over for cretinous political bosses. Here we find political ambition, lack of character, stupidity, and brainless tenacity sticking with people or ideals that weren’t worth sticking up for.
Motivation is not the sole factor in the category; comic spectacle is what we’re after, too.
And your nominees are:
1. Thomas Anthony Gordon. This econo-size chowderhead popped up on a local blog attacking Shawn Nelson for being a defense lawyer and therefore soft on crime. Which was funny because Gordo had had his own brushes with the law!
Since this goon lives in Santa Ana it wasn’t hard to surmise that he was working for somebody who had an interest in the 4th District campaign. At first we thought he was working for John Lewis and the Tom Daly Team. Well, maybe he was. But then he appeared as a petition circulator for Hairball Sidhu and we then knew whose payroll he was on.
Gordon even played victim card wackily claiming to have been intimidated by us for outing his tooling for Sidhu.
After we busted him for making anonymous comments on our blog he mercifully vanished from our radar screen.
2. Little Billy Turner. ‘Lil Billy popped up last February at a Fullerton Tea Party event passing out fliers for Hairbag Sidhu. Unfortunately he ran into Chris Thompson to whom he admitted that Sidhu was going to lose and noted that he had tried to get in touch with Shawn Nelson. Not knowing that his attempted double-cross in search of a winning candidate would end up as blog fodder he passed along his name and address to Thompson.
We had some more fun with Billy over at Sidhu’s empty campaign headquarters, too.
Later, we were told that Little Billy had been ensconced in Sidhu Fake Address #2 so that it would appear lived in. And we were informed that Little Billy had also turned into a sign thief. That sure seems in character.
It didn’t seem to have occurred to Little Billy that getting an honest job in one of Sidhu’s Pollo Locos would be more honorable than working for such a creep’s bogus scampaigns; but then given his own propensity for double-dealing, maybe part-time jobs in politics is the only kind of work he will ever have, or ever want. There will always be ‘pugs looking for cheap labor so Billy may find employment once every couple of years.
Oh, well. If working for Sidhu doesn’t scare you straight, nothing can.
3. 4SD Observer. This sad Grendel-like creature emerged in 2010 to defend the indefensible – the serial miscreance of Pam Keller. 4SD withstood a systematic dismembering from the regs, continually coming back for more. There was no hypocritical, stupid, lying, featherheaded thing that her Pam could say or do that could cause this devoted acolyte to cease soldiering on.
Hilariously, the series of quotations from The Manchurian Candidate by some of our Friends went zipping right over his/her head, every time. An irrational love for budget-busting public safety union members, hatred for Supervisor Shawn Nelson and a weird fixation on cooking harmless bunny rabbits sealed the deal.
In short, 4SD Observer was the quintessential intellectual face of the Keller years: sanctimonious, humorless, and confused; but mostly just brainwashed.
Oh political pond scummers, thank you for the hours of endless entertainment you have provided for this blog over the past year.
I’m looking forward to the next crop.
Little Billy is the gold standard for stooge. Didn’t he claim he was offered a bribe by admin?
Yep. He tried to save face by claiming that. Of course he shouldn’t have bothered. Nobody on Team Sidhu gave a damn anyway.
That 4SD Observer gets major points for sheer stick-to-it-iveness.
She’s got a lot more stamina than either Little Billy or Gordo.
I hear you JFD, but that Gordo gets points for greed. And Little Bille Turner gets votes for young and useless: he;s got a whole lie of zeroes ahead of him.
I found him. Is 4th SD Observer the old guy underneath the painting?
Naw, that’s Minard Duncan.
I’m going with the fullback on the front right.
It’s Pat
Hey, what ever happened to anonymity?
Hey, Savage, I just put up a file photo of the Collaborative and took my chances!
your information about billy turner is simply incorrect, so much for real journalism.
Really? Well, tell us all about Little Billy, such as: will he ever get and hold an honest job?
Compton, I wouldn’t even worry about it because I don’t think little Billy is going to win the Fringie anyway.
Thanks for the mention. I haven´t been here for a while and just happened to surf in to read what the neér do wells are writing about these days. You guys are the funny ones. The Manchurian Candidate references didn´t zip by me. They just weren´t worth mentioning. And the fixation on cooking bunnies went right past you. It was a reference to the Alex character in Fatal Attraction. Which perfectly described your fixation on Pam. Who by the way, has done nothing wrong despite your attempts to claim otherwise.
Lastly, I have no problem defending firefighters and police. Those are the folks who do their jobs and do them well. The (d)regs on this board criticize them as making too much money. If one believes these folks are getting rich on the taxpayer dollar, it only proves my belief this board is inhabited by small time thinkers. There are real millionaires being made at taxpayer expense, but you won´t cover them because you are clueless as to where to start looking. More proof of your two dimensional thinking.
Thanks for the mention. Much appreciated.
“There are real millionaires being made at taxpayer expense, but you won´t cover them because you are clueless as to where to start looking”
You nailed this one, JFD. No clue. No sense of humor, just fathomless self-righteousness.
“Look over there, over there.”
The cops and firelessfighters have recently taken to blaming illegal immigrants for all our woes. Of course a dyed in the wool boohoo of the Keller School can’t do that, so instead “it’s the millionaires!” Over there. Look, over there!
The millionaires are asswipes like McKinley and his ilk who are indeed a millionaires at taxpayer expense.
Hahaha!
FR, I didn´t blame anybody for anything. I only stated there are individuals who are making millions via the taxpayer and the small time thinkers like yourself are fixated on the salaries of police and fire folks. Some of those making millions on the taxpayer dollar (or via a government enforced monopoly) earn more in one year than a fire or police officer will earn in a lifetime.
Who the fire and police are blaming these days are of no concern to me. Only to those like yourself who are clearly envious of their achievements that are beyond your grasp.
Oooh! Oooh! Evil millionaires in the closet! Under the bed!
See response to Rudy.
You show you are also a small time thinker concerned about minnows when the whales are swimming past you.
The whales are the public safety cartels that are bankrupting us all.
4SD Observer, instead of speaking in predictable plot and movie characters like Fatal Attraction lets use the Evita Peron of politics and greatly dilute this historical character and the end result is Pam Keller. while Evita, the heart of the descamisado, “gave” away shoes to the poor,little eva was funneling most of Argentina’s GDP into her swiss bank account. political do-gooders who form collaboratives to help the poor usually do this solely for positive photo-ops to win the vote from those she really cares about, the people who buy her vote on government sponsored enterprises that doesn’t benefit the poor but those millionaires you grind your axe against..
Well said Van. In Fullerton Keller’s votes made tons of money (dare I say millions?) for bag men like Steve Sheldon who gave money to her Collaborative.
Are you making a claim of bribery? If so, put up your proof.
You know it´s all BS. Don´t worry, so do the sane that reads this blog.
Interesting perspective. However, inaccurate.
Why does your criticism dissolve into fantasy when the facts don´t support your preconceived animosity?
Might be because you have nothing left.
Damn, 4SD, you’re really working this hard. You might even get the Fringie after all.
Don’t kid yourself. I do in my sleep what you and your fellow (d)regs do with enormous amounts of energy.
Getting an award from a bunch of morons is no honor.
I’m sure you do your best work in your sleep. Keep it up. You’re gaining!
I’m not gaining on you. I’m lapping you.
I bet you think you had a snappy response.
Try again.
“I’m lapping you.”
Ugh. That’s just disgusting.
I’m not gaining on you.
No, you’re not. You’re gaining on Gordo and Little Billy Turner.
BTW, are you really in that picture?
“4SD Observer was the quintessential intellectual face of the Keller years: sanctimonious, humorless, and confused; but mostly just brainwashed.”
That’s freaking hi-larious