Those rascals in the white van have been hard at work lately. Or a least that’s what they keep telling us; and we keep providing them with vicodin tablets and Everclear.
Our narcotic investment seems to have paid off the other day for the boys have provided us with the the transcript of a conversation between members of the Tom Day for Supervisor campaign and a blogger from what used to be known as “Red County.” The conversation here seems to be about how the latter can help the former. Believe it or not.
John Lewis: Okay. Chris are you with us?
Chris Jones: Yeah I’m here.
JL: Okay, good. Raining up there? Aw, who the hell cares. Okay. Matt Cunningham is, um, here too.
CJ: Yeah. Hi Matt.
Matthew Cunningham: inaudible, high pitched squeak.
JL: Okay. Let’s get to it. We need some blog presence to go after Nelson, right?
CJ: Yeah. I’ve been trying for almost a year, you know, anonymous comments here and there. No traction, you know.
MC: And you got busted for that.
CJ: So did you, Jerbal.
JL: Forget it. Cut it out. We’re supposed to be working together. You both screwed up. Okay. What we need is a real person to start hitting Nelson on Red County.
MC: We’ve gotta be careful, not too obvious. Chip might pull the plug. He’s not too smart, but I think he’s starting to get, you know, um, suspicious.
CJ: Yeah, but it’s gotta be a real person. Then we’ll start commenting under different names.
MC: I can’t do it. What about Gordon?
JL: Gordon? Who the hell is that?
MC: Some dummy that used to blog for Pedroza. From Santa Ana. Doesn’t know his ass from from a pothole on 5th Street. He doesn’t know anything about the 4th District.
CJ: Perfect. Can he write?
MC: No. Well, sort of. You’ll have to write it for him.
JL: He may not want to attack a Republican. Will he want something?
MC: Dunno. He’s not too bright but he’ll probably want something. We can tell him he’s getting even with Pedroza for something. That’ll work. If he wants something you can offer him a, um
CJ: A banana?
(general chuckles)
JL: Okay. Jones writes the thing up then stupid puts his name over it. Great. Good. Okay. Then Jones and you can add to the threads anonymously. You’ve both had practice with that. If, er, whats’ his name?
MC: Gordon?
JL: Yeah, Gordon. If he wants something we’ll tell him Daly’s gonna give him a job if he gets in.
MC: Hey wait a minute. What about, you know, Laura? How many jobs is Daly offering around?
JL: Oh hell don’t worry about it for chrissake. Nobody’s gonna hire…
MC: Gordon?
JL: Right. Gordon. He’s just a plausible…you know…
CJ: Stooge?
(more general chuckles)
JL: Okay. Lets get, um, him on the phone.
MC: Gordon?
JL: Yeah, him. Hmm, looks like the cable company’s working outside the office again. Okay let’s make the call…
At this point transmission was disrupted by interference, rendering the balance of the transmission inaudible.
You FFFFers DO behave like Taliban mullahs. The reaction to any dissent from your blog’s fluid Koran — whatever it happens to be that particular day — is a hail of ad hominem attacks and personal denunciations.
It’s no wonder you’re all afraid to attach your names to your blog.